With any decision, it helps to think things through. Divorce is no exception. Deciding to divorce is a major decision. Ending a marriage is a life-changing event that will affect you in many ways. It has a ripple effect among various aspects of your life.
For many, getting a divorce is one of the most emotional events they will ever go through, second only to dealing with the death of a loved one. While the divorce trend seems to be on the downswing in the US, it still happens every day.
When deciding to divorce, your happiness is the main concern. Nobody wants to stay in a miserable marriage, but getting a divorce is a major decision, and there is no guarantee that it will solve your problems. It is a good idea to assess the pros and cons of staying married first before calling a lawyer.
Reason to Stay Married: It is Easier on the Kids
Getting divorced with children is never easy. You not only have to deal with your emotions, but also the questions from the kids. Plus, one parent has to move, and that can make custody and visitation stressful. Holidays can become emotional as your child has to split their time between both parents. While staying together for the kids may not be an option if there is a serious issue such as abuse or infidelity involved, it is something to consider.
Reason to Stay Married: You Do Not Have to Worry as Much About Money
One of the biggest issues in a divorce is dealing with asset division. There are bank accounts, cars, a home, retirement accounts, furniture, collectibles, and other things to split up. This often creates financial hardship after a divorce. This is a huge reason why couples never get divorced: they enjoy the financial security of life as a couple too much.
Reason to Stay Married: You Will Not be Alone
Many people are scared to get a divorce because they fear being alone. While many divorced people end up falling in love again and getting remarried, there is no guarantee that a divorce will lead to happiness with someone else. You might find The One or you might end up with a string of worthless relationships. Plus, dating is much harder after you have been married for decades, especially if you have kids.
Reason to Stay Married: You Will Not Have to Explain Anything
Dealing with the aftermath of a divorce can be emotionally draining. Your kids, parents, siblings, aunts, uncles, cousins, friends, neighbors, co-workers, and everyone else will want to know: What happened? You will have to continually explain yourself and people will start taking sides. Others may ignore you and stop hanging out with you. Your loved ones may be confused about what is happening. You can avoid all this by just staying married.
Reason to Stay Married: You Do Not Have to Deal With All the Emotions
Divorce is a rollercoaster of emotions. You are happy, you are sad, you are angry, you are bitter, you are hopeful—sometimes all on the same day. Nobody is immune to the negativity caused by divorce, so if you do not want to stay married, keep in mind that your feelings will fluctuate dramatically.
Reason to Get Divorced: You Get to be Free
Divorce brings about freedom. You no longer have to worry about your spouse’s needs. You no longer have to make sacrifices. You are now single and free to do what you want.
Reason to Get Divorced: You Can Fall in Love Again
If you have fallen out of love with your spouse, getting a divorce allows you to end your marriage so you can find someone new. Being in love again can be exciting, and if you have not felt the excitement of new love in a while, getting divorced can help you find someone with whom you are more compatible.
Reason to Get Divorced: There Will Not be Resentment
Many couples stay together instead of getting divorced, but they often fester in bitterness and resentment. You may blame your spouse for your unhappiness and consciously seek out ways to anger or annoy them. This resentment can explode into anxiety, depression, and even physical ailments. It can affect your children, as well. If you are truly unhappy in your marriage, get a divorce so you can feel better about yourself.
Reason to Get Divorced: You Can Find Yourself
Many people identify themselves through their marriage. They lose their sense of identity and cannot feel freedom until they get divorced. Many people start to find themselves after they divorce. Their priority is no longer their spouse or marriage. They now have time to rediscover themselves and find out what makes them happy. They can find new hobbies, travel, spend time with friends, and volunteer for causes they care about. Many feel more relaxed once they get divorced and are able to be a better parent to their children.
Reason to Get Divorced: It May be Easier for the Kids
In some cases, a divorce may be a better option for the kids, especially if there is abuse or neglect by one parent. If one parent isn’t pulling their weight and parenting as they should, then it may be better to split up.
Seek Legal Help
When it comes to divorce, there is never an easy answer. While you may think you want one, are you prepared for all the effects it will have on your life?
Broward County divorce attorney Scott J. Stadler can help you divorce with ease. We are committed to compassionate representation and will help you get the best possible outcome. Our office has more than 30 years of experience dealing with marriage and divorce issues. To schedule a consultation, call (954) 346-6464 or fill out the online form.