Marriage is tough. It is hard for people to get what they need out of a relationship and it becomes even harder when the couple is married. That is because to end a marriage, you need to get a divorce. And getting a divorce is not easy. Neither is recognizing the fact that your marriage is in disarray and something needs to be done quickly.
A bad marriage does not just make you unhappy. It causes immense mental harm. Not only do you feel sad and depressed, but communication tends to suffer. You do not want to be around your spouse, so you stay away from them. You may retreat to your bedroom or not even come home at all. You find reasons to stay away, growing the communication gap even further.
A bad marriage can also lead to abuse. You may get so frustrated that you engage in verbal abuse. Things could even turn violent. So take note of your behavior toward your spouse. If your marriage is causing you to become abusive, then it is time to get out.
How Mental Stress Leads to Physical Stress
Is your marriage making you sick? If you are constantly stressed out, then chances are, your body is stressed out as well. Doctors say there is a connection between physical well-being and emotional functioning. So if you are stressed out about your marriage and dealing with chronic fatigue, physical pain, and other diseases, then your relationship is, in a nutshell, making you sick. You need to take quick action to get out of your marriage before your health deteriorates further and you die.
Time to Make a Decision
If you have been unhappy in your marriage for a while, it is time to make a decision. You need to be proactive. Stop living in a bad marriage and find happiness. Here are some things you need to do to stop feeling trapped in your marriage:
- Reflect on yourself. Sometimes our feelings about our marriage are brought about because of our feelings about ourselves. Maybe you are not unhappy with your spouse but instead unhappy with yourself. So take a good look at yourself and how you are feeling. Are you in a rut? Have you gone through any big changes in your life lately? When was the last time you were truly happy? Sometimes we feel trapped when life is stagnant. If there is not a lot going on in your life, you may be just looking for a little more excitement and this does not necessarily mean your marriage is bad. Maybe you are just projecting your feelings onto your partner.
- Reflect on the relationship. If you have done some reflection on your life and have determined that your marriage is indeed toxic and in need of dire repair, then it is time to get out. You do not have to stay. You are an adult and do not need your spouse’s consent to stay in the marriage if you want to get out. You likely already know that, though, so what is causing you to stay? People feel trapped in unhappy marriages for many reasons. Guilt and shame are common, as you may be concerned about what people will say if you leave the marriage. Some people are fearful, especially when there are issues such as money or abuse involved. You may be afraid your spouse will harm you. How will you take care of yourself? What if you end up alone? These are all valid concerns that people have. In any case, you need to weigh the pros and cons before making a decision.
- Build up your confidence. Many people stay in bad relationships because they do not dare to leave. This is often due to low self-esteem. Stop feeling sorry for yourself. You have the power to make a change in your life, whether you realize it or not. Some people find that going to therapy or seeking support from friends and other loved ones can help you gain the confidence you need to make a decision and stop living in a bad marriage.
- Figure out your next move. You clearly cannot continue living in a marriage that is causing you mental and physical stress, so what happens next? Something needs to be done, whether that means working on the marriage or getting out. If there is physical abuse involved, you should not tolerate that at all and leave the relationship as soon as possible. If there is no abuse present, then you have other options. Staging an intervention with your spouse is a good idea. Let them know that you love them, but you no longer want this marriage as it is. Let them know what they need to do (go to therapy, etc.) to save the marriage. Then leave for a few days and see what happens. People will change if they truly want to. If your spouse does not change, though, and puts no effort into saving the marriage, then that should tell you what you need to know.
Seek Legal Help
Many people know their marriage is failing, but they do nothing to fix the situation. They are afraid to take action, causing their mental and physical health to suffer greatly in the process.
Don’t feel trapped in your marriage any longer. Seek legal help from Broward County divorce attorney Scott J. Stadler. We’ll assist you in moving on from a bad marriage. Schedule a consultation with our office today by calling (954) 398-5712 or filling out the online form.