The holidays can be stressful, especially after a divorce. If you have kids, you may be running in a million different directions, trying to get them back and forth from the other parent. You may be wondering where to go and what to do for the holidays.
After planning Thanksgiving, Christmas, and New Year’s parties, get-togethers, and other festivities, you may be ready for a sense of normalcy. Or maybe not.
Instead of enjoying yourself, you may be one of the many people who get the post-holiday blues. Instead of feeling happy and at peace, you might be feeling some sadness. You were having so much fun, so why do the festivities have to end?
The holidays bring about a lot of activity, and maybe you are not ready for it to end. The holidays seem to go by so quickly. The activities and family fun you have been looking forward to all year long are suddenly done almost overnight. Your home is now feeling empty. You feel like you are suffering a loss. So now what?
Time to go back to real life. Time to return to the drudgery of work. Time to deal with the kids going back to school. Time to deal with errands, appointments, meetings, and the other nuances of everyday life.
To cope with the post-holiday blues, you need to realize that what you are really feeling is an adjustment to less stimulation. Your “loss” is simply the reduction of activity you have become accustomed to over the past few months. You are experiencing a sudden letdown. You might have experienced this at other times. For example, maybe you have felt a loss after coming home from a vacation or finishing a project at work.
After the holidays, the biggest challenge you may face is feeling alone. This is especially true after a divorce. You may not have a romantic partner anymore, and if you have kids, they are splitting their time between you and the other parent, so you might have plenty of time to mope. Do not do that. Here are some tips to get through your post-holiday funk and feel happier.
Talk to Someone
We do not mean texting, emailing, or chatting with someone online or in an app. Actually call someone you enjoy being around — such as a close friend or trusted family member — and listen to their voice. You could also invite them over and chat with them in person. But do not complain to them about how you are feeling. Instead, keep the communication positive. Ask them to share their favorite holiday memories. You will get to relive the holidays again, which can boost your mood.
Get Out of the House
Your house was bustling with activity during the holidays, so it is a good idea to get out of it for a while, so you are not reliving the memories. Take a break. Go for a walk. Visit a friend. Grab some lunch. If you work from home, go work from a coffee shop or office space. If you can, take a mini vacation and spend a few days away from your home.
Schedule Time With Friends and Family
Planning some social interaction can help boost your spirits. Do you have loved ones that you don’t see very often? Instead of waiting until the holidays to see them, make a move and plan outings with them. Make it a point to spend more time with them throughout the year. Go see a movie or grab a coffee. Attend a concert, play, or another local event. Making plans gives you something to look forward to. Plus, staying connected to friends and family can help ward off feelings of loneliness.
Whether or not you made a New Year’s resolution to get into shape or exercise more, it is a good idea to get active. Exercise improves both your physical and mental health. It causes the body to release chemicals, such as endorphins and serotonin, that boost your sense of well-being and make you feel happier. Even though you might not feel like moving about, just a little bit of exercise is all you need. You do not even need to go to the gym. Aim for just 15 minutes of physical activity a day, and you will notice a huge improvement in your mood.
Going on social media and seeing everyone’s holiday photos and memories can make you feel even sadder. So get off your phone at night. Turn off the computer and TV, as well, and just spend some time focusing on your day. What was the best part of your day? Take some time to meditate and reflect. This can help improve your mood and memory.
Get yourself into the right mindset. Instead of thinking about the holidays past, think about the future. What plans do you have for the upcoming year? What are your goals? Are you looking at getting a new job? Maybe you want to move or make more money. Perhaps you want to start a business venture. A goal or plan can help you stop feeling blue over the holidays and get you on the right track to thinking positively.
Seek Legal Help
It can be hard to get through the holidays after a divorce. For some people, things can get even more depressing once the new year begins and life returns to normal.
Need post-divorce advice and legal help? See how Broward County divorce attorney Scott J. Stadler can assist you. Fill out the online form or call (954) 346-6464 to schedule a consultation with our office.